I’m recording audio on my phone so I’m really sorry if the quality is bad. Alright so, I thought I would update you on my makeup routine because I’m a women and bitches love watching women do their make up and there are so many people who do their make up again and again and its exactly the same every time around, and yet, we all still watch it.
What is it about painting a face that is just so interesting? Anyway, this is dodie in the year of our Lord 2020 painting her 25 year old face, let’s get to it. I’m on medication for my skin and I take spironolactone and I pay a lot of money to do that, but it means that I have such clear skin now.
So all I do for my foundation is mix my moisturiser with my foundation and slap it on my face and it gives a sort of dewy look. Now I truly am privileged to be able to do that and if you’re watching this with spots and cystic acne like I had, then you’re like “Bitch No…” and I understand and don’t let anyone tell you that it’s better to wear less of your face because they just don’t get it.
So if you wanna where a full face of foundation, go for it mate, and I’m so sorry, and I love you, and you’re still so fucking beautiful. Then you conceal. My current problem is the insane dark circles under my eyes, they’re so bad.
Oh, fuck I’ve knitted that quite tightly. Then I think I fill in my brows, I did so much stuff to my brows when I was younger. I really, just did not know what I was doing. All you have to do really is tint them like once a month, and then just get a wee little pencil and just draw on them a bit.
That’s all. I would mix my eye shadow with castor oil and literally paint them on. It looked like face paint. It looked so bad, it’s just so hideous, what was I doing? Anyway yeah, put on a wee bit of brow or don’t.
just do whatever you want really. I powder at some point. I brought this like brush because I thought it was a, (laughs) I thought it was a small blending brush. You know like the really fluffy ones? Where they’re like buy a fluffy brush so you can like blend it out? But its massive (laughs) so I just use it for my face powder now, and it is very soft so that’s nice.
So were on the fourth row. I use this sort of purpley eye shadow from this random naked palette. Yeah just sort of like outer corners to give my eyeballs a bit of depth. I like mascaras with lighter formulas, I’ve now figured this out.
A heavy formula makes my lashes just like droop. If you do a lighter one then you can kinda stick them up without a curler, though curling my eye lashes is such a game changer. I watched, I think an Instagram thing, you know when you go on your search on Instagram and its just full of like weird shit.
People doing stuff to their face they shouldn’t be doing, that does not work, rubbing toothpaste all over their chin and it taking off every blackhead that wasn’t a blackhead. Anyway I saw one of a girl like hair drying her eye curlers, so they were heated up and then curling her lashes, and then the first time I tried it, (laughs) I nearly burned a hole in my socket so I don’t recommend that you do that.
But if you warm them up and make sure that they’re not boiling hot to touch before you put it anywhere near your eyeball… and then you curl your lashes it makes them so curled, and they stay all day! It’s probably bad for them and they might all fall out.
but -lashes- Anyway now that you’ve done that, it’s time for the signature 2020 dodie dots, I didn’t invent these, but I really like them. I don’t know what it is about them that just kind of gives your eyes something to like, look at.
They give… they give you… the person looking at you something to look at. Add the dodie dots, I feel like the older I get, the harder this will be to do, because I’ll be drawing in-between the folds of my eyelids, my lower eyelids.
But while I’m young, I’ll enjoy it. There truly is no special way to do this. I think I started really small but then they got bigger and bigger, and I quite like them being dots. Just gauge it well for you know, what you want.
I don’t know what I’m talking about. Once this is done, I think I put on blusher, I really don’t know, but I’m just going to say put blusher on. Oh, here’s a tip, put blusher on way higher than you think it should be.
For me it works really well, like in my sockets, like in my eyeball sockets, like truly so much higher than you think, like here and here, and it gives you that kinda like, “ooooooh what? What did you say?” kinda look.
And then obviously the tip of my nose. I once got a really mean comment about the blusher I wear on the end of my nose they told me I looked like Arthur Christmas (laughs) that’s kinda funny, but it does stick with you.
And then you can put on lip balm, and here’s a really cool technique, if you put on lip balm I actually stole this from my friend Reb Day, legend, the queen, the model. Truly a model. Anyway, she puts lip balm on her lips and then she like dabs it on to her cheeks for like an extra bit of highlight, that sort of glow, the glisten.
Anyway, once you’ve done all that then you add lashes. Wait I don’t do lashes? Maybe I do do lashes? I ruined my beautiful mascara for that joke so. Urgh That’s about it, yeah, I like my face now.
I used to not. But I’m grateful that I do, and I recommend practising that out. This is just a make-up tutorial for me, you do you boo, whatever makes you feel happy. Right let’s see, what have we done? Well I seem to have knitted another B, so that’s good…